Perhaps...

It's been the two days without properly digesting food (thanks to a nasty stomach virus) or perhaps it's the affects of frenadol on such an empty stomach... it's hard to tell... But sitting at home on Saturday night watching Hamlet on DVD I cam up with a stroke of genius.

Dear Angelina...

I know you are a very busy lady but I am one who never shys away from helping someone... even so far as to look ahead to foresee any possible problems and solve them before they happen. With this in mind I have found you a possible next husband. God knows why you would leave the lovely brad... but heaven help the eventuality of such an unfortunate occurance, I have for you some condolance. I have for you the most genetically suited individual lined up for you (his now wife will also have to forgive me for writing this) however lets get to the point. May I suggest mr Karl as a suitable replacement. I am not sure what his views are on children but lets face it, if there was a match then can you imagine how fab the lips on your kiddies would be??? Did I mention the sexy Irish brogue? Enough said. Angelina, just remember you are rich and famous and I am not... so donations to my own personal charity are of course being accepted. (I've got to pay a mortgage somehow!?!?!)

Angie meet Karl

Thanks for you time...

You friend, Sarah

ps. you better act quick as on reflection he kind of looks like Pete Doherty all cleaned up and off the smack... best get your bid in as you may have to mud wrestle kate to get him.